These last few nights have been rather challenging, involving minimal sleep and maximum popping out of bed shortly after falling asleep. Coming on top of 5mon of broken nights, it has felt especially overwhelming at a few different points.
I almost find the days easier, as I would much rather just focus on doing the next task than constantly waking out of a deep sleep to go deal with little ones.
This morning I was definitely fighting a bad attitude, because even though I had actually gotten more sleep than the previous night, I hadn't had the luxury of sleeping more than 1 1/2hrs in one stretch.
As I began my devotional time, I started to realize that my perspective was all out of whack. I knew my attitude wasn't right, and was fighting to keep it in check, but realized that what I really needed was a new perspective.
You see, I had been viewing consecutive hours of sleep as my prerogative, something that I may not get all the time, but should be able to except at LEAST 50% of the time. God reminded me that I am a soldier under His command, on a mission for Christ to raise these boys and fight with Josh on our particular battlefield. Not only that, but according to James 1:2-4, the 'trying of my faith' works patience, and will eventually work in me to be 'perfect and entire, wanting nothing'.
So, if I look at these seemingly endless nights of interrupted sleep as my mission for Christ, and be on my guard against attempts of the enemy to entice me to be grumpy/short/lazy/etc and excuse it as 'I'm tired', it actually becomes much more bearable, and even a bit exciting... :-)
Not that I always feel that thrill at 2 in the morning, but it did help me through today, and hopefully through tonight... ;-)
And, they're definitely worth it...